Hat for Pat

So anyway, A trend has surfaced at work. Basically, Maz, Hannah (r.i.p) and I simutaneously decided that big silly fur hats are in. It doesnt really matter what colour, shape or even if they are real or faux, the most crucial factor is, they have to be big, stupid and made of fur.

I couldn't help but notice Patrick's melancholy, it is clear he feels ostracised.

Patrick only shops in All Saints, finding a big stupid fur hat could prove tricky for the poor mite, so I have searched the internet far and wide and arranged a selection for him to choose from. It is not fair that I have three silly fur hats and he has none, plus, I want him to morph into me before he morphs into Ben H.

Made from a fox that spent most its life addicted to crystal meth, this hat, complete with tail, gives the illusion of some crazy blonde hairdo, whilst keepings ones face warm and snug.

Silly factor?-6/10

Most apropiate for?-Wearing whilst clearing the carpark.

Would I wear it?- No

Would pat?- I hope not.

Just like the crazy fox hat, this hat also gives the illusion of a stupid hairdo, although this has a added feature, a face. The face adds character, thus providing inspiration for conversation. People will either love it or hate it.

Silly factor?- 4/10

Most apropiate for?-Cloakroom/door

Would I wear it?-Damm right

Would Pat?-Probaly not

One could always sway towards the classic look. Davy Crocket hats are all the rage somewhere, anything named after a bloke has to be big somewhere. Regardless, this style of hat is fun, controlled chaos.

Silly factor?- 3/10

Most appropriate for?- Bar

Would I wear it?-Well this hat is in the sale so I am going buy it. so Yes.

Would Pat?-we'll see..

There again, one could always opt for the abstract approach. This hat ponders the question, "at what point precisely does a wolf become a hat?" Hats that throw such philosophical questions will guarantee extra points for effort.

Silly factor-10/10

Most appropriate for?-Housekeeping

Would I wear it?-Not just yet.

Would Pat?-I'd be sure to marry him if he did.

Pat loves All saints, As in, everything down to his pants are from All Saints. If All saints has taught us anything, its that distressed, old and tatty things look hip and chic if worn ironically. With this in mind, tell me what is more distressing than wearing a complete fox on your head?

Silly factor?- 7/10

most appropriate for?-Cloakroom/door

Would I wear it?-yes, maybe to a festival or a Vegan rally

Would pat?-He should.